A Godly Woman in Her Leisure Time

A Godly Woman in Her Leisure Time… this is a loaded title. In order to speak on this topic, one would have to assume that the speaker is a “Godly Woman”. In so many ways I feel inadequate to take on this responsibility. There are multiple times throughout the course of a day when I know I am not representing “Godliness”. I am not always the meek and quiet wife I should be. My frustration gets the better of me in my dealings with my children. Even though our home is a constant place of gatherings and fellowship I am not always the most generous and hospitable hostess. There are moments when I have failed miserably at being the “Christ like” image and witness that this world needs to see when I am in public. And although I have the reputation of possessing a laid back personality, I have acquired the skill of slicing an individual with subtlety. The mere reality of knowing just how “ungodly” I am can be overwhelming and I wonder if I will ever grow from what and where I am to true “Godliness”. In times such as these, I often find myself reflecting on the happenings, details and focus of the day (if not week). As a result, I usually find that my behavior is due to a lack of time with the Father in prayer and His Word. Prayer is the lifeline that has been given as a form of communication between us and the Holy, Righteous Creator of this universe. His Word is the blueprint by which we are shown how to survive in this world even though we are not of it. So, if I have deprived myself of these two necessities, then how in the world do I expect to represent, walk and live in “Godliness”?
The demands and responsibilities that we wives hold seem to be endless. I personally have the privilege of being a wife, mother of 4, homemaker, house keeper, school teacher, nurse, cook, waitress, janitor, peace maker, chauffer, and laundry attendant in our home, among others. There are times when I just want to allow my brain to breathe, take a short sabbatical and enjoy “leisure time”.
According to the Webster’s Dictionary, the definition of “leisure” is “Freedom provided by the cessation of activities, especially time free from work or duties”. Paul H. Wright states in The Holman Illustrated Bible Dictionary that, “The Bible recognizes the need for regularly scheduled breaks from work. The weekly Sabbath (Exodus 20:8-11) and several yearly festivals (Lev. 23:1-44, Deut. 16:1-17) were intended to focus on Israel’s spiritual needs but also provided breaks from physical labor. In fact, the Mosaic Law mandated a yearlong honeymoon for newlyweds (Deut. 24:5, Luke 14:20)...”
Anyone who truly knows me is fully aware of the fact that one of my most favorite places in the entire world is to be with Jimmy (my husband)… preferably cuddled. I love his company, conversation, friendship, everything about him. He seemingly has the capability of relieving my stress regardless of the day. I also enjoy catching a good movie, listening to music, going somewhere to enjoy the wonder of God’s creation, or collaborating and creating with others artistically. For some, leisure may be cooking, for others it could be reading a book, some may prefer to shop, exercise, talk on the phone or sip on a cup of coffee/ tea while enjoying a pleasant conversation. “Leisure” has many faces and comes in many forms. This creates a question. Can leisure, although recommended scripturally, become sinful at any point? I believe it can, especially when the leisure time is misplaced. When any form of leisure takes precedence to the gentle tugging of the Holy Spirit that prompts us to spend time with Him, then it has most definitely developed into sin. The problem lies when leisure becomes our first and sometimes only means of release. Those favorite pastimes have been made into idols and before we know it, we have lost the sense of knowing how to think of time spent with Him as enjoyable, but rather as just another task that we have to push through. There have been times when I have been so exhausted that the focus needed to read, pray or meditate on His Word requires more effort than I am willing to sacrifice. All I want to do is “chill” and not “think”! Wow… how self-centered is that? Where does pray without ceasing (1 Thes. 5:17) and delight in the Law of the Lord, and on His Law should I meditate day and night (Psalm 1:2) come into play? How ironic then that I wonder why I have a problem with portraying “Christ likeness”.
What example did Christ set as a model for us to follow? What did He routinely do whenever He went off to get away from the crowds and disciples? He prayed. I think there is something to be said in this. Even though Christ was fully God, He was also fully man. His physical body required the relaxation that mortals must have. During this time of relaxation He deliberately positioned Himself in such a way where His mortality would not give way to sin. Times of fatigue and exhaustion are prime occasions for our flesh to be given opportunity to rise up and surrender to the desires that we are too tired to fight. We are “too tired” to make the necessary sacrifices that are needed to remain focused on a life of Godly submission and obedience. If I am in need of a release/ rest and it is Christ that I am having difficulty representing to the world and my family, then wouldn’t it make sense for me to follow Christ’s example? Christ showed us that it is an honor and privilege to go to the Originator and Creator of all things, at all times, regardless of our “feelings”.
We live in a culture that lacks a true understanding of suffering and deprivation. Regardless of one’s financial status or living circumstances, the fact remains that we live in a land of abundance. It is an abundance of media, entertainment, activities, food, relationships, etc. Suffering believers that live in other regions of the world, consider prayer a necessity for daily living. They risk their lives to merely possess the Holy Scriptures that have become their true daily bread. Our nations’ privileges are such distractions. We have allowed for them to be given power that keeps us from enjoying the intimacy that all believers should experience with the Lord. In light of these things, I have to soberly ask, “How ridiculous does my need to “chill” sound?” The answer is that my priorities must change, which in turn will determine my definition of leisure. In addition, I am learning that as I attempt to spend time with the Father, I must also be willing and ready to allow for the time to be one of self-examination. As He washes me with His Word, my hearts’ cry must be that He exposes every ounce of what I look like before Him. When there is a lack of self-examination, the result of the time spent will only become an increase in head knowledge without life transformation. If we come to these times with this in mind, then the gospel will be that which bleeds into our everyday interactions. As I truly get to know Him and clearly see what it is that I look like before Him, then my interactions will change to resemble “Christ likeness”.
I have come to the conclusion that relaxation is necessary but that Christ must become my first exhale. He must become the One I first seek for “cuddling”, the One I first enjoy. He must be my #1 leisure.

Grace & Peace
Nikki Miles

Gender Roles and Campus Ministry

Since the issue of gender roles within parachurch organization is such a hot topic, I figured I'd link you to Wayne Grudem's article on the subject.

So right-click here and download (for free!) his book Evangelical Feminism and Biblical Truth, flip to page 384, and start reading.

The rest of the book is simply excellent. It consists of biblical answers to arguments made.

Grace to you,
Derek

President-Bashing: The Biggest Problem in the Church?

I recently was pointed to an editorial which pointed out how our treatment of President Bush must make us look in the eyes of other nations. Here.

I wonder how many of us who call Jesus 'King' are also guilty of President-bashing? The root of the problem runs deeper than mere dislike of our current President, however.

It's a problem of authority. And it runs deep...
Who has authority?

Parents or children?

Pastors or church-members?

Governmental officials or citizens?

Men or their wives?

The Scriptures or my thoughts?

The Scriptures or my feelings?

The Scriptures or my experiences?

And ultimately... God... or me?

Manliness, manliness is what I long for...

I was having a conversation with a few guys about manhood a few days ago, and we got into a disagreement about what it means to be manly. So I figured, hey, let’s look at what the Bible has to say about manhood.

1) God expects us to just know what it means to be manly. In 1 Corinthians 16:13, Paul says, ‘Act like men.’ And in 1 Corinthians 11:14-15, Paul says, “Does not nature itself teach you that if a man wears long hair, it is a disgrace for him…?”

We’ll get to that ‘long hair’ issue in a second – but note this: God expects us to just know what manliness is.

2) Some of what manliness is is culturally relative. 1 Corinthians 11 is about head coverings. In the verse I just cited, Paul says, essentially, don’t you know that a head covering (long hair) on a man is effeminate?

Now, we don’t ‘know’ that per se. It was something unique to the Corinthian culture. But the fact is – they would’ve known that wearing a head cover in their culture was effeminate.

Application? There are things in our culture that are girly. So I can say you listen to girly music. Or like girly movies. Or talk in a girly way. Knock it off and toughen up, guys.

3) Only men are called to exercise authority in their families and in the Church of God. Of course that authority should be gentle (1 Peter 3), not domineering (1 Peter 5), and for the love of the saints/one’s wife (1 Peter 5; Ephesians 5:22ff).

But it’s still authority. That means a dude has to be decisive, responsible, and a leader. He has to own the direction for his family – and before he can do that, he needs to be decisive and responsible about his position as a Christian.

4) Godly men are to be willing to suffer. Ephesians 5:22 and following tells us a godly husband should suffer for the holiness of his wife because he loves her. So our love should compel us to suffer for the holiness of Christ’s bride and his people, in general.

Real men embrace suffering.

There’s a strength about that. You can look back to 1 Corinthians 16:13 about it.

5) Godly men protect God’s people against attacks against the glory of God.

Adam, as recorded in Genesis 2, was responsible for the commands God gave. Eve wasn’t even around when God gave them. And Adam did jack when Satan showed up.

He was supposed to speak up, act as his wife’s authority, and kill the serpent. Likewise, in the Church, the elders are commanded (Titus 1) to teach sound doctrine and silence those who contradict it.

Oh but that sounds so… harsh.

6) Men have a natural tendency towards violence – and that’s not a bad thing. Adam was supposed to kill the serpent. The priests (Numbers 3) were supposed to kill anyone who dared desecrate the temple. Only men were called to be soldiers.

Sometimes protection means we rebuke people. Sometimes protection means we use force. And that’s what men are called to.

Of course that can be abused. But those abuses aren’t what we’re talking about right now. Some things require violent action, and men are put in those positions for violent action. No man gets an exception.

7) Men are to lead courageously. In Judges 4, Barak failed to courageously lead God’s people into battle. Deborah, a judge in Israel, calls him out and mocks him – because he wanted to be protected by a woman.

8) Men are to determine the actions of their churches. In Isaiah 3 God mocks Israel – saying that women are leading them. He does that to mock the men. They should’ve been sticking up and leading Israel. They failed.

So there’s just a little bit. I’m not talking about stuff like love and gentleness here- those things that every Christian is commanded to obey. It’s clear from these Scriptures (and more) that men are to be uniquely men.

They are to lead. Take authority. Take responsibility for the Church of God. Silence those who would lead the sheep astray. Take responsibility for their families.

So men – you know this stuff. A few things to do:

A) Own your own spiritual growth. Stop being a spiritual coward, start following Jesus your King. That means submitting to his word and taking your own sin seriously.

B) Own your family’s spiritual growth if you have one.

C) Step up in the Church. Think of ministries to do. Do them. Step up when they ask for volunteers. Stop looking to be entertained and start taking risks to serve God.

D) Know the Bible. Speak the Bible. Rebuke those who contradict the Bible.

Guys – any more you can think of?

A Brief Exposition about THAT part of 1 Timothy 2

God says, "I do not permit a woman to teach or to exercise authority over a man; rather, she is to remain quiet." Paul here is talking about teaching in the church and exercising church authority. How do we know this? Well, he's writing to Timothy first of all - who was overseeing the appointment of elders/pastors in churches! He's addressed teaching already (1:6) and goes right on to talking about qualifications for eldership. The reason this is important is because this does not prohibit conversations between men and women regarding the BIble - but it does prohibit the teaching of men publicly. And in our culture, that sounds rather strange. After all, women can be Professors, CEOs, etc - but this isn't really addressing those particular jobs. And so we should ask 'why?'

God begins to give us the reason why in the following verse: "For Adam was formed first, then Eve." That sounds a bit odd, doesn't it? Why would it be significant that Adam was formed first? Paul really only addresses Adam here in 1 Timothy - and in Romans 5, 1 Corinthians 11, and 1 Corinthians 15. In two of those cases when Paul talks about Adam it's in the context of Adam's breaking of the Law having the effect of subjecting all humanity to death. In one (1 Cor. 11), it's about how men and women are to operate in the Church - acting accordingly to how God has created the genders differently - with men acting as the authorities. I'll return to that in a second, though.

And then we look back at Genesis 2 - and we see something very significant happening. Adam was given the prohibition not to eat from the tree before Eve was around; and Adam was given the command to begin ruling the earth (in naming the animals) before Eve was around. So in other words, because Adam (man) was there first, God put him in a position of exercising doctrinal and practical authority. (Eve was given to him to compliment and help him as he led in doing that.)

And so when Adam broke God's Law (covenant, specifically - see Hosea 6:7), it wasn't Eve's lawbreaking that counted for humanity - it was Adam's - because he was acting as the 'covenant head.' That means that he would exercise authority over people in the covenant that humanity had with God - and that he represented them. Adam's being created first put him in that position. Hence, 1 Corinthians 11 and it's focus on 'headship' - that is, authority.

In 1 Timothy 2 - unlike in Paul's other writings - we see Eve's lawbreaking/transgression referred to. Given what we've just looked at, isn't that odd? And isn't it weird that Paul calls her deceived and a transgressor - and says that Adam wasn't deceived? Yeah, that's weird. We need to ask why that is, because Adam indeed WAS deceived and DID become a transgressor.

What happened in Genesis 3 is this: Satan addressed Eve and asked her to make a decision for the family! For the first church! It wasn't that she was more easily tricked or something like that - it was that she was the object of Satan's deception. (The form of the word 'deceived' in Greek permits this idea, and the context, as shown, supports it - Adam was deceived and did transgress.) So what did Satan do? He overthrew gender roles in tempting Eve and having her act as the authority in the relationship - as it regarded God's word and his commands.

And this overthrow results in a further overthrow of what gender roles are to look like. When God curses them (in Genesis 3:16), he tells Eve that her desire will be for her husband, and he will rule over her. That's a weird expression, but it is used again in a more clear way in Genesis 4:7 - Cain sinned against God, and God told him that sin was crouching at his door - and sin's desire was for him - but he must rule over it! In other words - sin was seeking to supplant man - to take him over by deception and manipulation - trickery. And Cain was commanded to 'rule' it - but 'rule' isn't a kind, gentle rule here - it's a dominating, abusive rule that would hurt 'sin' a lot. So the curse becomes further sin - women become manipulative, seeking to supplant man's authority. Men use their authority to abuse - or like Adam, don''t use it at all - even though they should be using their authority for the protection of the Church from sin!

So what is happening in God's recreating the world by what Jesus did - and now in the Church - is that God is restoring human relationships to the way they are supposed to be. Man is to act as the authority at home and in the church - but in a loving, serving way that points us to God. They are to act as God's representatives as elders in churches, communicating God's covenant-message and enforcing it - and in the home, doing the same - and in both - representing the Church's new covenant head - Jesus.

Women are to be subject to men (see this passage, Ephesians 5:21, Titus 2, 1 Peter 3:1-7, etc.). This does not mean they are not to have a ministry in the Church! They ARE supposed to. Rather, it means that their ministries should fit within the rubric of how God has created - and is reforming - relationships - with man as loving and sacrificial authority for woman's holiness - and with woman as responsive to God's word, communicated by the men in authority, serving in the church in various ways for the progress of God's Kingdom - including teaching God's word to other women (Titus 2).